John Matrix Lumber Co. - Unisex Hoodie Color:Black Captain Freedom retiring from televised

Captain Freedom retiring from televised murder to sell fitness tapes is the most honest career pivot in television history

brown jacket over red plaid flannel and white undershirt

The periodic table is now one dad joke away from being a complete comedy set

gripping an M134 minigun

large bold "Ah

John Matrix Lumber Co. - Unisex Hoodie Color:Black Captain Freedom retiring from televisedRetiring from spec ops to carry logs sounds peaceful until the customer retention strategy involves holding people off cliffs by one ankle. Bennett showing up in chainmail really complicates the small business loan. Inspired by Commando. The Details: A cartoon illustration of John Matrix in a white tank top carries a brown log over one shoulder, flanked by green pine trees. A gray crosscut saw banner with brown handles displays dark block serif text